CNN-Gupta Does Publicity Sleaze Surgery After Haiti Quake

by Heidi Stevenson

19 January 2010

Dr. Sanjay Gupta, Saint

"Celebrity Surgeon" Sanjay Gupta of CNN rushed to Haiti to perform emergency brain surgery on one child in the midst of an earthquake disaster that has claimed tens of thousands—possibly hundreds of thousands—of lives.

Since seeing the headlines of Saint-Surgeon Gupta's Sanctified Surgery on Sympathetic Sad Little Haitian Girl, my blood has slowly come to a boil. In the face of massive disaster—millions of people homeless—hungry—thirsty—and tens of thousands, perhaps hundreds of thousands dead and dying, CNN has flown their medical reporter, Sanjay Gupta, complete with entourage, to remove a chunk of concrete from the brain of one.little.girl.

Of course I'm sorry for that little girl. But what of the thousands of others? How many hundreds—perhaps thousands—of others, including little girls, might have been helped, even kept from death, with the thousands of dollars spent to rush CNN's sleazy Gupta to Haiti for a network's scoop?>

The US Navy saw a chance for its own aggrandizement. The USS Carl Vinson, a supercarrier assigned to Haiti has hardly been used. In desperate need to justify its posting in Haiti, one sad case to tug at the heart strings was found, a little girl with a concrete chunk in her head. And they did the right thing (for their public relations). They contacted CNN.

Gupta, who had been considered for the post of Surgeon General under President Obama, said, "I was honoured to help out." Help out what? CNN's ratings?

In the ultimate of condescencion, Gupta said, "I have a profound respect for the capabilities of the US Navy and the medical team on board the Carl Vinson."

Amidst the horrors that have visited Haiti's already benighted people, modern media sees it as nothing more than a marketing opportunity. Can't you just see it? Marketing guru says, "How can we use this to increase our ratings?"

Minion goes home and tells his wife, "We've got a real problem at the shop. Huge story, but we can't get our people in to report. What're we gonna do?"

His wife, not hearing a word, says, "Did you hear about poor Susie? She's got a brain tumor from that cell phone she's always using."

"A brain problem? Hey! We've got a reporter who's a brain surgeon on the side...All we hafta do is find a Haitian kid with a brain injury—oughtta be easy to do after a quake—and fly ol' Sanjay, he of the big ratings, down to Haiti to do surgery!"

"What? What about Susie?"

Minion-husband, heading for the telephone, "Thanks, honey! You've solved our problem! We're gonna go out for a steak dinner tonight!"

Gupta was rushed to the Navy ship for the publicity surgery. He tells the story from there:

Someone got a hold of our international desk. They said there was an urgent call from the Carl Vinson. So I put a call in to them and there was something about a head injury. I was honoured to help out. I have a profound respect for the capabilities of the US Navy and the medical team on board the Carl Vinson.

Ain't that grand? Sanjay Gupta, of course, went along with it. How could he say no? After shilling for Big Pharma's swine flu vaccines, he needed to find a new marketing venture. This one had it all: hopeless little girl caught in tragic disaster, chance to be a hero, US Navy needing you to justify deployment of a ship that can do very little (at millions of dollars) on its assignment, and an easy straight-forward case—remove a chunk of concrete from a child's brain. No way to lose. If it's successful, Sanjay's a hero for saving her life. If not, then he's a sad hero who tried.

All hail Sanjay Gupta, Hero of Media Marketing!